another reality...
I was wandering through an artists' studio of a metal worker/blacksmith in Boulder in my first week back in the states. I had filled my week with trying to catch up. With people, with details like money and taxes.. and I had many emotions.. happiness, peace, love.. and some angst, overwhelmingness, and definitely over-stimulation. My haven of being a continent away from anyone or anything that knew me was interrupted. And I was trying to do too much in one day.. already. I met this artist.. a beautiful, amazing woman.. with a great spirit and energy. I followed her around the shop.. taking in all her beauty.. and I saw this quote on the wall..
Perfect. I smiled. A lot of my trip and the past year of my life is embodied in those words. The questions, "have you found yourself yet? are you figuring life out?," are dreaded ones. My answer is no. One of my fears upon returning to the western world is that I will lose the peace and solitude I found within myself. I didn't have to deal with the stresses that I left behind. I had my own schedule with no one to answer to. Sounds pretty great, huh. I also didn't have human touch.. hugs and affection.. the love of my friends and family all around me.. my mountain bike, cross country skis or iBook. I could go on and list all that I had and didn't have. I don't want to. I do want to hold onto the peace I made with myself and with my life.. the spirit inside of me that was impacted by my travels and the people I met.. and the patience and openness that I cultivated. And the pace of life that I created for myself.. and was generally all around me. I want to do all of this without buying a cabin in the woods and retreating there. I know that I can and will.
I will post more about the second half of my trip.. I definitely abandoned the task while traveling. Here are some pics of what I've been enjoying the last two days, a lot of it spent on my mom's porch in Chippewa Falls, WI.
The cats.. Asher.. is seriously the fattest cat I have ever experienced.. and Lucy the queen. I sound like one of those cat people.
My crocs!
the return to drip, STRONG coffee..
good beer.. this is a very hoppy, delicious ipa.. Bell's Brewery.. Comstock, MI
my bed!
a self-love photo.. i'm really excited that my face looks normal again.. i went through a terrible phase of my face breaking out/allergic reaction/something nasty.. and now it's better!
if you can guess what this photo is.. i'll buy you a beer.. to be redeemed at The Snout, chippewa falls, WI.. or your choice
celebrating earth day with b&j.
i obviously have too much time on my hands you might be thinking.. definitely not the case.. All these material things.. good wine, strawberries, salad, single track, springtime in WI.. are pretty great. Not as great as all the wonderful people I now have in my life.. within an arm's reach or a phone call or short plane ride. For these people I am truly grateful.. and in heaven with.
peace,
h
Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
Perfect. I smiled. A lot of my trip and the past year of my life is embodied in those words. The questions, "have you found yourself yet? are you figuring life out?," are dreaded ones. My answer is no. One of my fears upon returning to the western world is that I will lose the peace and solitude I found within myself. I didn't have to deal with the stresses that I left behind. I had my own schedule with no one to answer to. Sounds pretty great, huh. I also didn't have human touch.. hugs and affection.. the love of my friends and family all around me.. my mountain bike, cross country skis or iBook. I could go on and list all that I had and didn't have. I don't want to. I do want to hold onto the peace I made with myself and with my life.. the spirit inside of me that was impacted by my travels and the people I met.. and the patience and openness that I cultivated. And the pace of life that I created for myself.. and was generally all around me. I want to do all of this without buying a cabin in the woods and retreating there. I know that I can and will.
I will post more about the second half of my trip.. I definitely abandoned the task while traveling. Here are some pics of what I've been enjoying the last two days, a lot of it spent on my mom's porch in Chippewa Falls, WI.
The cats.. Asher.. is seriously the fattest cat I have ever experienced.. and Lucy the queen. I sound like one of those cat people.
My crocs!
the return to drip, STRONG coffee..
good beer.. this is a very hoppy, delicious ipa.. Bell's Brewery.. Comstock, MI
my bed!
a self-love photo.. i'm really excited that my face looks normal again.. i went through a terrible phase of my face breaking out/allergic reaction/something nasty.. and now it's better!
if you can guess what this photo is.. i'll buy you a beer.. to be redeemed at The Snout, chippewa falls, WI.. or your choice
celebrating earth day with b&j.
i obviously have too much time on my hands you might be thinking.. definitely not the case.. All these material things.. good wine, strawberries, salad, single track, springtime in WI.. are pretty great. Not as great as all the wonderful people I now have in my life.. within an arm's reach or a phone call or short plane ride. For these people I am truly grateful.. and in heaven with.
peace,
h
posted by heidi at 4:58 PM
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